At the end of “Saving Private Ryan,” the elderly James Ryan, turns from Captain John Miller’s grave (played by Tom Hanks) and asks his wife, “Am I a good man?” Sometimes other people, with their unique perspective of our actions, are better positioned to assess the incongruities between what we think about ourselves and behavior (Romans 7:1). Although the answers can be disturbing, asking is necessary for our maturity in Christ. Examining our behavior gives voice to beliefs that we otherwise ignore or disguise. James holds the key to discerning our beliefs in light of our behavior; “I will show you my faith by my works” (Jam 2:18). We need to pay attention to what our actions tell us about our beliefs.
As worship leaders, we have God’s calling and authority to lead. God gave us talents, strengths, vision, authority… everything we need to accomplish the work He ordained for us. I’m often perplexed and frustrated how to manage these resources toward these goals. Sometimes my supporting musicians and vocalists are difficult to manage causing conflict in the team. Maybe that’s why Dr. J. Vernon McGee says, “Satan fell out of heaven right into the choir loft.”
How do we respond to conflict? I, being naturally introverted, withdraw. Others might lash out to squash the uprising or dissension. I heard one music minister excused himself from rehearsal, went to his car and returned with a gun. Our reactions to emotional, physical, mental and social stresses as well as the pressures of ministry are the mouthpiece of our hidden beliefs. When we withdraw or lash out, are we representing God’s gift of authority and grace to lead? Probably not. What is worse is sometimes our self-perceptions deafens us to our actions’ voice. We need loving and committed partners, preferably people who are not influenced by our ministry, to help us interpret our behavior.
In John 11, the raising of Lazarus, there is a little comment that has a BIG application. In verse 44 Jesus says, “Remove his (Lazarus’) grave clothes.” I see three important principles for us; 1) Lazarus had new life but still had wrappings of death. The same is true for us. In theological terms; we are completely redeemed but not completely sanctified. A continuing part of the sanctification process is Jesus telling our friends to “remove his grave clothes.” 2) Lazarus’ wrappings didn’t suddenly fall off him in Superhero style, they were removed his friends and 3) Unwrapping grave clothes is done one layer at a time; it’s a process accomplished over time. Like Lazarus, we emerge into new life in Christ covered with bondages of death and like Lazarus, need patient care-giving friends willing to take the time to unwrap these weavings of death that bind us. Friends unwrap grave clothes by observing our actions and lovingly speaking their message. By their graceful and merciful examination of our heart’s intents, counsel, prayer and encouragement, our friends can free us from our grave clothes. We need friends like that.
Background
I accepted Christ on September 13, 1980. At 20 years old, I was completely lost but very aware of that there was a spiritual existence that was eternal. On that day, I heard God’s audible voice. (AMAZING! That God would condescend to me in a miraculous way!) At the hearing of His voice, that moment I know the reality of God. I also new this knowledge demanded a full commitment of service and response to Him.
Introduction to Worship
As a new believer, I immediately sensed the importance of worship, not merely at the services, but to live a life of worship. In 1983, I started to study worship and worship leading while I attended The Vineyard in Yorba Linda/Anaheim. I helped two friends plant two churches in Orange County and now my family and I attend a progressive Foursquare Church. I continually study the Bible on worship and worship topics.
Ministry Accomplishments
I have led contemporary worship bands since 1985. We performed a few concerts at other churches and couple of community events each year but worship in those days was not as popular as it is today. I used to lead worship in a congregation of 800. The smallest group I’ve led in worship has been myself and the largest was about 4500. I recently enrolled in a Bible School and have cut my commitments to leading a mid-week Bible study where I lead worship, leading a preaching fellowship (we are learning to communicate better), and leading worship at a bi-weekly men’s function. I also support a Song Writers ministry. Occasionally, I teach people the basics of leading worship in an 8-week course (about 20 hours total).
Other Related Accomplishments and Interests
I tried to produce a ‘record album’ of original worship music of the last concert that the contemporary worship band performed but had several technical difficulties that made that effort difficult. I settled for a cassette tape. I have served as a sound engineer for some of the churches I attended and taught others how to do sound. I design audiophile speakers and sound systems and have served as a sound consultant for setting up PA systems. I designed and build choir monitors, PA speakers and other sound reinforcement equipment.
Personal
I am happily married since December 30, 1983 and have two children. I currently work as an optical engineer at NASA’s Jet Propulsion Lab designing and building the next generation space clocks that should be accurate to one second in 30 million years’ not that I expect to be here then! I feel the Lord is leading me to be an administrative or executive pastor, which is one reason I enrolled in school. I will graduate in October 2002. I play rhythm guitar for worship only. I am learning how to write music all over again. I look forward to the day when we will live in the light of Christ in the new Jerusalem with new bodies that can completely serve Him without compromise or fainting. Maranatha!