Director’s Notes:
Ray has been speaking from the book of Ephesians and in Ephesians 4, Paul talks about how we need to stop lying to each other and speak the truth. He then goes on to talk about anger and stealing and finally bad language. I decided that this was too much to tackle in one drama so I settled on bad language.
Now, tell me that as you read this, you don’t see yourself behind the wheel. C’mon, I dare ya!
BTW, I recorded this again pretending that I’m merely thinking these things (except for the parts where I sing at the beginning, talk to the drive thru speaker, and yell at the lady on the road…) You don’t need to record this but it’s effective if you can do it…
Cast:
Dave: A normal Joe
Drive thru person: (Off stage or on tape)
Eric: Greeter at church
Props:
A chair
Setting:
A car
(LIGHTS UP CENTER STAGE where Dave is driving his car.)
Dave: (singing) “Here comes the sun, da da da da, here comes the sun and I say it’s all right …” man, what an unbelievable day. I mean, who could ask for a more perfect morning? I mean, look at me? I’m all dressed up for church, I’m driving a cool car, I’ve got a new haircut? What’s not to love? Yeah, I look pretty cool this fine morning. Not a care in the world. Nope. Not me. It’s an unbelievable day!
Dave: (Looks at watch) Okay, let’s see, it’s 10:00. Church doesn’t start until 10:30. I’ve got plenty of time. You know what I’m thinkin? I’m thinkin’ McMuffin. Yep, but not any McMuffin. I’m thinkin’ sausage McMuffin. (homer) ooooooh, sausage McMuffin. (wipes drool from his face). Okay, McDonalds it is.
Dave: (pulls into drive thru) “Hello? Hello? Anyone there? Hello?” (incoherent voice) “What? Are you talking to me?” (incoherent voice) “Whatever. Can I get a sausage McMuffin?” (incoherent voice) “A SAUSAGE MCMUFFIN!” (incoherent voice) “yes, and a black coffee…. Hello? Did you get that?” (incoherent voice) “I’m pulling forward now. Here I go…” (incoherent voice)
Dave: Where do they find these people? I mean, when I worked at Burger King as a kid I took my job seriously. I wore my BK crown with pride! I allowed people from all walks of life to have it their way. I’d hold the pickles and the lettuce… yeah, those were the days of real fast food. And speaking of? What’s the hold up? How can they call this fast? There’s only one other car? What’s the problem? What are they ordering? What could be taking so long? I just ordered one lousy sausage McMuffin. If I had only gotten here 2 minutes earlier, I would have been on my way. But now I’m sitting behind this minivan. I think there are 8 people in there! They must be ordering everything on the menu! I’m doomed!!!!!!!!
Dave: Finally. (looks in drive thru window) Hello? Hello? There’s like 10 people in there just standing around. Couldn’t one of them get my sausage McMuffin? What a bunch of slackers! C’mon. Don’t make me honk my horn here folks. Ooops, here she comes. Finally.
Dave: “Hi.” (gives her the money and gets his food) Well, excuse me. How about ‘sorry for the wait’ or ‘That’s a nice haircut’ or something. Alright. It’s over. After all, I now have my lovely sausage McMuffin. (takes a bite). Wha? Where’s the sausage? How hard can it be to mess up a stupid McMuffin? I’m gonna go back in there and give them a piece of my mi… oh man, it’s 10:20 already? Grrrr. Unbelievable…
Dave: Okay, settle down my man. Not that big of a deal. Let’s just get going. Man, 29 is getting bad and the drivers are getting worse. Look at that guy. He just went through a red light. It must have been red for 10 seconds! Where are the cops in this town? That guy should be in jail. Yep, headin for the big house. Yeah.
Dave: Whoa! Aw man, that would be my coffee in my lap! I can’t believe this! Where did she learn how to drive? Arggh. Okay, let’s see who she is? “Hey, learn the rules of the road would ya, you loser!” She shouldn’t be driving? Where are the cops in this town? She should be in jail is where she should be. Man. Unbelievable. (looks at watch) Oh great, I’ve got 2 minutes. This is just great. Better haul.
Dave: (Drives crazy) Look out. Watch it. Comin thru. Okay, turn. Yep, that was still yellow. No doubt about it. Okay, where’s a place to park? What, are they gonna make me park out in the field? Who owns that white van? They’re there every Sunday. Some people. (gets out of the car) (Dave is greeted by Eric, a greeter).
Eric: Good morning sir. It’s an unbelievable day isn’t it?
Dave: (kinda sarcastic) Absolutely brother, you can say that again… (they walk off the stage)
(LIGHTS OUT)
END
(c) 2000 Dave Marsh
Hello and welcome to Stage Right, the online drama ministry of EXW. My name is Dave Marsh and there are a few things you should probably know about me. First, I’m not a ‘theatre guy.’ I’ve never quoted Shakespeare (at least seriously), and I’ve never played Daddy Warbucks in Annie. Second, I received my ‘training’ in writing, directing, and acting at a church called Willow Creek (in Illinois.) Third, I’m an online games producer by trade but my real passion is found in telling others about Christ through contemporary church drama.
I have a few opinions about drama in the church as well. I think that contemporary drama is both underutilized and misunderstood. I believe it is something like 5-10 years behind contemporary worship. When many churches think about using drama, it usually involves the Passion Play or a children’s Christmas musical. Many people don’t have the opportunity to experience what are called ‘slice of life’ dramas. These dramas may last only 3-4 minutes long but create a powerful (and many times humorous) illustration on any given Sunday. I also believe that any church, no matter what size, can use drama effectively, giving God glory, and inspire/convict normal folks like you and I to walk closer to God
So, what’s Stage Right all about? It’s about offering you the advice and resources you need to help you create and act in contemporary Christian dramas. I’m no expert, but I’ve seen lives changed as I continue to strive for excellence in this area, constantly praying that God would use me to tell others about how to live for Him. Over the coming weeks and months, I hope to provide you with articles about creating a drama philosophy, working with your pastor, developing a team, writing short effective scripts, directing actors, and acting on stage. I also look forward to hearing from you, taking suggestions on topics that you feel should be covered
Over the last 3 years, I’ve written over 45 dramas that are easy to memorize, require few actors, and are highly humorous and relevant. These dramas are available to you for free and will be added to this site over the course of the next few months. You can currently download all of these dramas from my personal site (www.dave-marsh.com) and can contact me personally if you wish (dave).
I look forward to serving you here at EXW and want to thank Steve for asking me to jump on board.
In His hands
Dave Marsh